I’m Gradually Learning To Let Go Of The People Who Diminish My Value
15 Things People Don’t Notice You Are Doing Because You Have Self – Respect Now
Although it consists of only two letters, the word No is the most difficult word to pronounce for some people. Undeniably, this short word has a strong meaning which usually shows refusal, denial, and disapproval of things which oppose our moral values and social principles. As a result of this, people tend to associate No with negativity, which is wrong. Negativity ensures that people never get satisfied and powerful. Contrary to negativity, No helps us show the strength of our character by staying loyal to our beliefs and values, and not conforming to those of other people.
How to say No with confidence?
There’s a number of occasions when we don’t say No because we don’t want to disappoint other people, but is this explanation justified? According to Daniel Ames, a professor of management, it does not necessarily mean that those people whose proposals or requests for help we have rejected will be highly disappointed. In his opinion, the decision to accept or refuse a request depends on whether we have determined what our priorities and goals are. Some people find it easier when they accompany their No with an explanation. Although this can be quite helpful and comforting, you should be aware of the possibility that the requester may use tricks to make you accept their request.
For example, they can make the request more appealing to you or impose a deadline on you to choose whether you accept their offer or not. In addition, many of us say “maybe” to offers when the real answer is No. Guy Winch, a psychologist, warns us that by saying “maybe” we may raise someone’s hopes and make the situation difficult. As for having to say No to your closest friends, you shouldn’t feel guilty just because you believe that you’re saying No too much when, in fact, your friend is asking too much, thereby making you feel uncomfortable.
Saying No at work.
Thinking that your boss at work only wants you to do what they tell you to do is wrong, says the marketing and strategy consultant Dorie Clark. In the case of knowledgeable workers, it wouldn’t be wise if the boss doesn’t take into account your perspective. Similarly, if the boss asks you to do something which cannot be done, it is your responsibility to tell them. Moreover, if you say yes to all opportunities, potential contacts and requests all the time, there is a risk that you won’t get any meaningful work done.
You have the right to say No.
By starting saying No more often, you also begin accepting your true personality. Lauren Zander, a life coach, explains that if people get more used to saying No, they’ll like and believe in themselves more.
The steps to No.
Saying No should make you feel free to withstand any pressure to comply with other people’s requests. However, if you still find yourself incapable to pronounce the word No, here are some useful tips:
Think about those who are close to you. If the things other people want you to do can set limitations on your commitments to your family members or co-workers, focus on them while preparing your answer.
Don’t get too emotional. Even if you are worried about having said No to someone, maintaining calm behavior will ease that experience for you.
Rehearse the word. If you have to say No to your parents or your boss whom you’ve never said No, try rehearsing it in advance.
Keep it simple. Most people can sense that they will get a No as an answer. Therefore, you don’t need to replace the simple No for some unnecessary kind explanations.
