Finding ways to raise mentally strong children can be a really tough and challenging process. To achieve this it’s necessary for parents to get rid of their unhealthy habits which prevent their dearest ones from growing into mentally strong children.
Making children take responsibility for their own actions or watching them deal with problems or negative emotions, isn’t easy for sure. Yet, these negative practices don’t allow children to understand the real meaning of life.
Parents who focus on teaching their children right life values don’t do the following 11 things:
1.They don’t allow a victim mentality
No one has a perfect life, including your children. Situations, like failing to perform well at school or failing a class, don’t make your child a victim. Allowing your child to simply get used to the problems and not do anything to overcome them is what makes them victims. It’s your attitude that is important. When children experience difficulties in life, it’s crucial for their parents to teach them how to find ways to do things in a better way without waiting for somebody else to do that for them.
2. They don’t rely on their feelings of guilt
All parents make mistakes, and they often have to struggle with feelings of guilt. Yet, mentally strong parents don’t let these feelings affect their actions. So, if they’ve denied their child something, like buying its favorite toy, they stick to it. Having feelings of guilt isn’t an excuse to allow your child to do or have whatever it wants.
3. Their child is not the center of the universe
We all know children occupy the most important part in their parents’ lives. However, this doesn’t mean that children should be brought up with the idea that they’re more important than everybody else. Raising children with such an idea can end up turning them into selfish and arrogant people. Instead of emphasizing their importance, mentally strong parents teach their children about things they can do to contribute to the world.
4. They aren’t governed by fear
All parents do their best to protect their children. But, striving to keep your child away from all sorts of danger isn’t a wise move. Parents who are mentally strong offer their children support and guidance while letting them experience different things in the world, at the same time.
5. They don’t allow their children to be more powerful than them
By letting their children have control over what and how things are done at home, parents break the hierarchy within the family. Parent are those who state the rules so that all family members live in a harmony. Mentally strong parents ensure that their children get used to doing things they don’t want to do and listening to those they don’t want to hear.
6. They don’t expect their children to perform things perfectly
Of course, it’s good teaching your children that they should always try to do things the best way they can. Yet, expecting perfection in all their actions is completely wrong. Mentally strong parents know that if they their children try to do things perfectly, they can easily fall into the habit of constantly comparing with the others surrounding them. Instead of that, such parents teach their children how to take each new opportunity to perform things better than previously.
7. They teach their children take responsibility
Mentally strong parents allow their children to fulfill their responsibilities. They make sure that their children get equipped with the necessary skills and mental strength so as to turn themselves into responsible and independent citizens.
8. They don’t protect their children from pain
As I’ve already pointed out, watching your children experiencing difficulties or pain is tough. However, children need to learn how to cope with all the negative experiences they come across. In this way they’ll become more mature and mentally stronger, and they’ll also feel more confident and ready to struggle with negative experiences.
9. They make a difference between discipline and punishment
Parents punish their children when they do something very bad. On the other hand, if children are taught about discipline, it means that they are aware of the right things to do and of the ways how to avoid making mistakes.
10. They let their children make mistakes
Both parents and their children make mistakes, and that’s normal. Mistakes are good because they enable us to learn how to do things right. That’s what parents who are mentally strong do. They allow their children make and learn from their mistakes. This helps children get more experienced about different things in life, and it also teaches them how to accept the consequences of their wrong actions.
11. They stick to their values
It’s easy to get caught up in the process of trying to keep pace with all the obligations your child has. Performing their school assignments and domestic chores regularly and on time shouldn’t be your main focus. Mentally strong parents always find time to make sure their children cherish the right values and act in accordance with them.
Image: Elizabeth Sallee Bauer